Zhanalytics
Brooding Stares: 6
Intense Eye Contact: 2
Facial Twitch: 4
Fist Clench:
I see that "How boring" is Lan Zhan speak for "I cannot admit I would really like that." Also, I trust that we will get to see Wei Wuxian carry Lan Zhan at some point, because that's Chekov's Piggy Back Ride there. You brought it up, writers, now deliver the fan service.
I love the little magical telepathic paper ginger-bread man thing.
Wei Wuxian finds the cave. Aw, was that the tiniest little look of approval he got from Lan Zhan?
Wen Chao is bossy and annoying and I hope that he and his lady friend are eaten by a grue. Jin Zixuan appears to agree. I am starting to like him slightly, against my better judgement. He's still a stuck up, rich, over-entitled prig, but at least he tries to do what's right.
Wei Wuxian "volunteers" to be the first down into the possibly bottomless chasm. By being such a smartass that Wen Chao kicks him in.
"Luring that thing with flesh and blood means leaving us to die!" I think that's the idea.
NO YOU ARE NOT GONNA MESS WITH MIANMIAN!
I really don't feel like Wen Chao has thought this through? Is he really gonna murder every clan's heirs in this cave? I guess he could claim the monster did it.
Did Wen Chao really not recognize a quote from The Quintessence of the Wen Clan? What a dumbass.
"Wei Wuxian. Don't act rashly." Girl, have you met him?
Wen Zhuliu has resting "I am so over your bullshit" face. I wonder if he acquired this only after being assigned to be Wen Chao's bodyguard.
Snek! Big danger noodle! Big nearsighted danger noodle!
I agree with Jiang Cheng: Wen Chao is an asshole. I mean, he has always been a jerk, but here he's just showing that he can't cope with something that he can't simply bully. Like a giant danger noodle.
Oh, excuse me, it's not a danger noodle. It's a danger turtle. That little island-like formation appears to be its shell.
Yes, Wen Asshole cut the ropes. But can't you dudes all fly? Oh, only when you have your swords, right? Also, I retract any sympathy that I had for Wen Chao's mistress, because she tried to MESS WITH MIANMIAN. She deserves him.
"It's okay, my parents will come find me." Oh, muffin. Who are you and who invited your clan on this field trip? Guess we needed someone to make Nie Huaisang look good. Where is Nie Huaisang, anyhow? Did he get left behind after he passed out while reciting the Quintessence? Or is he just wisely trying not to draw attention to himself in this scenario?
Aw, Mianmian. Don't cry. Mianmian is like the 60s-era Doctor Who Companion of this show, always tripping over and shrieking at inconvenient moments. This must be why I feel so protective of her despite the fact that she's kind of useless here.
There is blood on Lan Zhan's robes. Wei Wuxian looks aghast at the size of the potential drycleaning bill.
And now he's messing with the headband again.
"Don't you feel uncomfortable wearing wet clothes?" Not half as uncomfortable as he is with you taking his clothes off.
"I didn't flirt with you anyway." This sentence requires an additional clause for truth value. Like, "I didn't flirt with you in the last 10 seconds anyway" or "I didn't flirt with you while you were in Gusu and I wasn't because I haven't learned the cultivation spell for long-distance flirting anyway."
The eloquence of Lan Zhan's facial expressions in this exchange:
Wei Wuxian: "I see, you like Mianmian."
Lan Zhan: A silent stare that says, "Seriously, how stupid are you?"
Wei Wuxian: "You do like Mianmian!" (with a very slight but noticeable hint of disappointment.)
Lan Zhan: A silent stare that says "Oh my god, he's too dense to see it and I am incapable of making it any plainer. I'm doomed. Is it too late to just go back and get eaten by the Danger Turtle?"
It is too late to get eaten by the Danger Turtle in this episode, but maybe next time?
Brooding Stares: 6
Intense Eye Contact: 2
Facial Twitch: 4
Fist Clench:
I see that "How boring" is Lan Zhan speak for "I cannot admit I would really like that." Also, I trust that we will get to see Wei Wuxian carry Lan Zhan at some point, because that's Chekov's Piggy Back Ride there. You brought it up, writers, now deliver the fan service.
I love the little magical telepathic paper ginger-bread man thing.
Wei Wuxian finds the cave. Aw, was that the tiniest little look of approval he got from Lan Zhan?
Wen Chao is bossy and annoying and I hope that he and his lady friend are eaten by a grue. Jin Zixuan appears to agree. I am starting to like him slightly, against my better judgement. He's still a stuck up, rich, over-entitled prig, but at least he tries to do what's right.
Wei Wuxian "volunteers" to be the first down into the possibly bottomless chasm. By being such a smartass that Wen Chao kicks him in.
"Luring that thing with flesh and blood means leaving us to die!" I think that's the idea.
NO YOU ARE NOT GONNA MESS WITH MIANMIAN!
I really don't feel like Wen Chao has thought this through? Is he really gonna murder every clan's heirs in this cave? I guess he could claim the monster did it.
Did Wen Chao really not recognize a quote from The Quintessence of the Wen Clan? What a dumbass.
"Wei Wuxian. Don't act rashly." Girl, have you met him?
Wen Zhuliu has resting "I am so over your bullshit" face. I wonder if he acquired this only after being assigned to be Wen Chao's bodyguard.
Snek! Big danger noodle! Big nearsighted danger noodle!
I agree with Jiang Cheng: Wen Chao is an asshole. I mean, he has always been a jerk, but here he's just showing that he can't cope with something that he can't simply bully. Like a giant danger noodle.
Oh, excuse me, it's not a danger noodle. It's a danger turtle. That little island-like formation appears to be its shell.
Yes, Wen Asshole cut the ropes. But can't you dudes all fly? Oh, only when you have your swords, right? Also, I retract any sympathy that I had for Wen Chao's mistress, because she tried to MESS WITH MIANMIAN. She deserves him.
"It's okay, my parents will come find me." Oh, muffin. Who are you and who invited your clan on this field trip? Guess we needed someone to make Nie Huaisang look good. Where is Nie Huaisang, anyhow? Did he get left behind after he passed out while reciting the Quintessence? Or is he just wisely trying not to draw attention to himself in this scenario?
Aw, Mianmian. Don't cry. Mianmian is like the 60s-era Doctor Who Companion of this show, always tripping over and shrieking at inconvenient moments. This must be why I feel so protective of her despite the fact that she's kind of useless here.
There is blood on Lan Zhan's robes. Wei Wuxian looks aghast at the size of the potential drycleaning bill.
And now he's messing with the headband again.
"Don't you feel uncomfortable wearing wet clothes?" Not half as uncomfortable as he is with you taking his clothes off.
"I didn't flirt with you anyway." This sentence requires an additional clause for truth value. Like, "I didn't flirt with you in the last 10 seconds anyway" or "I didn't flirt with you while you were in Gusu and I wasn't because I haven't learned the cultivation spell for long-distance flirting anyway."
The eloquence of Lan Zhan's facial expressions in this exchange:
Wei Wuxian: "I see, you like Mianmian."
Lan Zhan: A silent stare that says, "Seriously, how stupid are you?"
Wei Wuxian: "You do like Mianmian!" (with a very slight but noticeable hint of disappointment.)
Lan Zhan: A silent stare that says "Oh my god, he's too dense to see it and I am incapable of making it any plainer. I'm doomed. Is it too late to just go back and get eaten by the Danger Turtle?"
It is too late to get eaten by the Danger Turtle in this episode, but maybe next time?
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